SF City Life

Streetside: The Tenderloin

If San Francisco was high school the Tenderloin would be that punk kid who never showered, came to class reeking of booze, and carved the Dead Kennedy’s logo on every desk he sat at. He’d get suspended every other week and probably spit on you if you bumped into him down the hall. But at the same time you’d find yourself strangely intrigued by his behavior because deep down you knew he just didn’t give a fuck what anybody said, and part of you kind of admired him for that. What better place then for the Ashcan crew to hit the streets and ask the first question of our new word of mouth series, Streetside:

“What’s the craziest thing you’ve seen in the Tenderloin?”

Asked on Market Street and around Civic Center.

I saw a woman, obviously homeless, she pulls her pants down, bends over, starts getting talcum powder and padding it down there and sits back down. I look at the guy next to me and said, “Only in San Francisco.”

The general penis flapper, which would be the gentleman peeing not towards the wall, but liberally and freely onto and into the street, just flapping it to get the urine off.

I saw a guy who was smoking…there was literally smoke coming from his body. The fire ambulance was there and his shirt was just on fire. I don’t know what was going on, I guess they put him out.

One guy—I didn’t see him get stabbed—but he had obviously been very recently stabbed. A few blocks down I saw one of those stakes you use to hold up young sapling trees with covered in blood on the sidewalk.

Right up here on Turk, I saw this woman laying on the ground with no pants on with her legs spread open like she was delivering a kid, and she’s got piss going all the way down to the street curb. She’s just laughing her ass off. It looked like a monstrous hairy Bigfoot.
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